The Dark Knight Rises - A Review

**MAJOR SPOILERS!!!**

"The Dark Knight Rises" has had a HUGE buildup of anticipation. It is arguably one of the most anticipated movies of all-time. Now, the real question is: did it deliver? As much as I hate to write these words, I have to say that it failed to deliver in many aspects.
The acting, as usual for these movies, was great. Christian Bale did his usual great job as Bruce Wayne and Batman, and, of course, Gary Oldman, Morgan Freeman, and Michael Caine were their usual spectacular selves. The surprise of the movie was definitely Anne Hathaway as Selina Kyle. She blew away the low expectations and while she is not a perfect fit for Catwoman look-wise, her acting was incredible and Selina's attitude was spot-on Catwoman. Tom Hardy, on the other hand, does not fare so well. While his size was not a problem and he definitely conveyed Bane's physicality, his Bane voice was absolutely horrendous and was one of the worst things that I've EVER had the misfortune of hearing in a movie. It was far too cartoonish for a live-action movie and absolutely grating on the ears. I could not wait for him to get off of the screen for his voice alone. Yes, it's that bad.
Hans Zimmer's score was great and arguably the best of the trilogy. You could feel the raw emotion in the music and definitely told the story as well as the images on-screen. The score was a huge sweeping epic and I fell in love with it as soon as it started playing. Zimmer never fails to disappoint.
In terms of storytelling, the movie trips and hits the ground pretty hard. Nolan attempted to craft a large, expansive story, with the entire movie playing out over six months. However, depth was definitely sacrificed for scope. The movie has HUGE plot holes that completely defy any form of logic. Majority of them are thrown right in the audiences' faces and simply cannot be ignored. Why does Batman trust Selina Kyle even when she completely betrayed him to Bane and was the catalyst that led to his breaking? He even tells her, "You made a serious mistake." How does Bruce, who is completely broke and halfway around the world, get back into Gotham City, which is in a state of complete lockdown? He even arrives clean-shaven and looking pretty good for a guy who was nursed back to health from a broken back with a bit of bread, some water, and some push-ups and sit-ups. How on Earth did Batman somehow managing to survive a six-mile-wide nuclear explosion when he was clearly in the Bat seconds before it blew up? There is absolutely no indication that he ejected beforehand and put the Bat in autopilot. It's huge plot holes and leaps in logic such as these that really ruined the movie for me. Even the time span in the movie was poorly handled. It definitely did not feel like Bane had control of Gotham for three months. Nobody, not even the police officers trapped underground, looked like they had been down there for three months. It looked like it was only a few days, if even that. Also, why would they wait until the hour before the bomb goes off to make their move? It's poor and contrived writing, which is far from expected from Nolan and company. Other scenes could have been cut out entirely. The small arc with the government's agents being sent into Gotham, only to be killed by Bane two minutes later, was essentially a waste and added nothing to the story. I would liken these movies to Nolan having a ball of Silly Putty. He had a solid ball of Silly Putty in "Batman Begins". He stretched it slightly in "The Dark Knight", but it was still solid. In "The Dark Knight Rises", he stretched it so far that it started ripping and tearing apart.
Even the characters and characterizations suffer in the movie. Bruce Wayne definitely suffers the most. He's spent the past eight years languishing in self-defeat due to the death of Rachel. He's become so withdrawn that not only has he stopped being Batman, he's stopped being Bruce Wayne. In this, I feel that Nolan's portrayal of Bruce was off. Bruce would never stop being Batman. He is completely committed to his cause, even though it causes him pain.
Others, such as Bane and Talia al Ghul, are definitely not given their due. Talia was wasted as a villain and her romance with Bruce felt completely forced. Bruce spent the first half-hour of the movie depressed over Rachel's death. Why the sudden turn-around and romance with Talia? Bane proves to be nothing more than Talia's pawn. While you could argue that him being a pawn doesn't change what he did in the movie, it definitely changes the way that you look at it as you realize that nothing of what happened was his own planning. Others, such as Holly Robinson and John Daggett, have such minimal roles that they could have ignored them entirely. Holly plays such an insignificant role that her name is actually not spoken at all during the duration of the movie and disappears entirely in the epilogue. Daggett is turned into a stereotypical, generic evil businessman, whose plot to take over Wayne Enterprises adds absolutely nothing to the story other than to try to make you feel sorry for Bruce and his current situation.
Overall, the movie was a big disappointment. I had gone in with low expectations, as nothing in the trailers had impressed me. I wanted Nolan to blow me away. He didn't. While the movie has a bit of humor and some great moments, like Bruce climbing out of the Pit and Bane breaking the Bat, it has many problems story-and-character-wise that severely detract from the quality of the movie for me and are completely unforgivable in such a huge character-driven film. This is completely unexpected from Nolan, as there's no arguing that he is an amazing filmmaker. For me, as hard as this is to say, as both a huge Batman fan and cinema lover, this is not the finale that Batman deserves.
2/5

Madagascar 3: Mini-Review

**MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS!**


It's been four years since the last installment of the successful "Madagascar" franchise. In "Madagascar 3", we're reunited with Alex the lion, Melman the giraffe, Gloria the hippo, and Marty the zebra. Though most franchises eventually seem tired and worn-out, this one continues the excellence set by its predecessors and takes you on a great ride throughout Europe.
The movie starts off where the second one left off. The gang is still stuck in Africa, with the penguins and chimps having left to Monte Carlo and make it big. Marty and the rest journey there as well to pick up the penguins and the chimps and head back to New York and the Central Park Zoo. However, things don't go according to plan and they incur the wrath of the Animal Control Captain Chantel DuBois, who they then lead on a wild ride throughout Europe with their new circus friends, who then take over the story, as they must get the circus back to form.
The movie itself is hilarious and arguably the funniest out of all of them, with King Julian's love affair with Sonya the bear being one of the best and funniest romances I've seen in a long time. The story itself does a great job of carrying the movie along and definitely makes you care for all of the characters, both old and new. The creative team did a spectacular job with the circus performances. They're breathtaking and definitely the best sequences in the movie. If you haven't yet, I highly recommend checking this out before it leaves the theaters.

4/5

The Lab Rat: An Original Short Story

And so my soul was slowly drained away, trapping me in the midst of the negative zone, attempting to hold me captive forever, with only an older model cell phone to keep me company. *    *    * Though I received small food rations from my captors, my hunger hardly subsided. I plotted my escape. This barely-liveable place could not hold me forever. *    *    * At long last, I saw it: A chance to escape! The cell guard was vulnerable when he gave me my daily scraps of food. I had to eliminate him silently. As soon as the guard opened the door to give me my meal, I struck, snapping his neck and guiding his body silently to the floor. Now for the main guard. I waited for him to become suspicious at the cell guard's continued absence. I stayed around the corner, then struck when he walked past me. He fell without a sound. *    *    * I soon reached the outside of the prison. Multitudes of filth and decrepitude greeted me. I saw few living souls, most being lost within their own madness. What do I do now...? *    *    * I spotted a guard patrolling in his car. I hid in a nearby alleyway. I saw him park and enter the prison, so I knew the alarm would soon be raised. I cautiously made my way to his car. He had left it unlocked AND left the keys in the ignition! I opened the door and started the car. Suddenly, gunshots rang out! I ducked as low as I could. I heard glass shatter as the bullets blew through the car. I put it in drive and sped off, reaching the freeway in minutes. Good... *    *    * I drove for what seemed like days, though it can't have been more than an hour or so. I drove until I came to a small hotel, renting out a room with the money that the guard had left in the glove compartment. I slept fitfully that night. The escape... It seemed far too easy. Was there something that I was missing? *    *    * They found me. I don't know how, but they did. I'm trapped and out of options. Everything I did was for nothing. How can it end like this...? *    *    * I woke up, gasping for air. I was chained to a chair. The room was small and unlit, save for a small desk lamp. There was a man across from me, face in shadow. "Do you know why you're here?" he inquired. I simply stared, not daring to speak. "Do you happen to realize what you've been a part of? I continued to remain silent. "Well, I suppose that I wouldn't presume to act as though you were part of something big. You have been part of an experiment. You were simply my lab rat; Nothing more." He began to pace. "Humans become feral and revert to a primitive state under certain conditions. We set up these controlled testing environments and gave you limited tools in which  to accomplish your goal. Namely, your escape. Surprisingly, you didn't use the cell phone provided to you and instead relied on your quick wits and some physicality that you must've picked up from the previous tests." I was taken aback. Previous tests? "Your performance was more than satisfactory this time around. Now, however, we must start the trial again. Your mind will be wiped as standard protocol dictates and you'll be given an extra tool for this trial. Perhaps a pocket knife. Enjoy this set of memories while you can."  With that, a door behind me opened and I was dragged to a cell, awaiting my mind wipe. However, a plan occurred to me. *    *    * I'm writing this to myself. The time before my mind wipe is short. I've recorded this story on the phone given to me as the ultimate tool that you can use, so that you can know what's going on, what's going to happen. You can win this fight against this enemy and escape from their inhuman experiments. Now that you know, do whatever it takes to win, to beat them. Already my mind feels fuzzy... Hazy. I feel like my soul is being drained away... *    *    * How long I've been kept captive, I cannot say... END

My Ideal Version of Marvel's Phase Two

Currently, Marvel says that they have five movies in various stages of production for Phase Two of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Marvel commits to two films each year, so they have a slate of releases up until 2015, as far as we know. A few of these are already well-known. In 2013, we're going to get "Iron Man 3" and "Thor 2". In 2014, we're definitely getting "Captain America 2". This leaves two movies that we don't know anything about, though speculation on what the two films are is running rampant. I, too, have a few ideas that I believe Marvel could be running with.
For starters, I believe that the second movie released in 2014 shall be "Doctor Strange". Marvel plans to introduce cosmic storylines, as well as mysticism and magic. Having a Doctor Strange movie would be a HUGE step in the right direction. However, one thing that would somewhat work against Doctor Strange getting a movie soon is because Doctor Strange was never an Avenger. Well, he's a part of the New Avengers, but he is far from a mainstream character. Also, he's never been teamed up with the likes of the Hulk, Iron Man, or Black Widow, as the New Avengers is mostly B and C-list heroes, with Spider-Man and Wolverine taking up the A-list slack. To have the Sorcerer Supreme in a movie with the original Avengers would be... Odd, to say the least, especially when we don't yet have the original Avengers team assembled together. We're still missing Ant-Man and Wasp. However, since Edgar Wright is making another movie before he starts production on "Ant-Man", it will be 2015 or 2016 before we get it.
For 2015, I believe that we'll see an adaption of the Guardians of the Galaxy and Black Panther.  The Guardians provide the cosmic elements that Marvel is looking to adapt, as well as opening the door for other characters, such as Nova. Besides that, the Guardians also often fight against characters such as the Kree, Skrull (of which the Chitauri, the army in "The Avengers", are an offshoot), and Thanos, who, as we all know, was the character revealed at the end credits scene of "The Avengers". It's the perfect opportunity to give these these factions the backstory that they need and deserve, as well as setting up potential threats for the Avengers to face in the future.
Black Panther definitely has to be made. He is one of the key Avengers and has a great backstory that everyone can get behind. He's extremely empathetic and audiences will feel for him, assuming that he's done correctly. Also, there have been multiple references to him already in the MCU, with a map at the end of "Iron Man 2" shows Wakanda, his country, and they've had multiple references to Vibranium, which is only found in Wakanda. Captain America's shield is made up of Vibranium, in case you didn't know. Joss Whedon stated that he wanted to get all of the Avengers in a movie one day. Black Panther is one of those required heroes.
2016 (depending on what ends up happening) should see Edgar Wright's "Ant-Man" and that should lead directly into "The Avengers: Thanos Imperative" (just throwing a title out there, though this title is of great importance). Beyond this, however, I can't say. I do think this outline would probably be the best way to do this, and Marvel is probably considering a path along this line. Either way, these are my thoughts and my outline for the future of the MCU. Hope you enjoyed it :)

Assassin's Creed 3: Tried-and-True Or Tired Out?

So within the past few days, we had our first glimpse of gameplay for the next title in the Assassin's Creed universe, Assassin's Creed 3. It gave us a few glimpses of the improvements to the game, as well as hinting at the storyline this game will follow. However, I am decidedly unimpressed with almost everything the trailer had to offer. Let's take a look at the gameplay shown during the trailer...
I must say, what was shown was unimpressive. The gameplay remains almost identical to the previous iterations of the franchise, stretching all the way back to the first game, first released in 2007. Granted, there are many advances to the combat and available moves, but nothing is overly different and it feels a bit too familiar. I'd actually liken AC to CoD. In my opinion, AC has become the CoD of action-adventure games. Throwing in a few new things, but without true innovation. Yearly updates with improvements. It's not as bad as CoD, but the comparison is there. In short, it's stale and has become formulaic. The only thing that I would say this game has going for it is the setting. There is a HUGE shortage of games set during the Revolutionary War and it's a nice change of pace from the WW2, modern warfare, and future warfare settings that have long since been the norm in the industry for quite a few years now. There was that one History Channel Civil War game, but that didn't turn out quite so good... But I digress. All-in-all, AC3 is going to have to do a lot more work to impress this gamer. At this point, it looks like it's nothing more than an expansion pack, as opposed to a true sequel.